writing

Interview: Eliel Cruz (Journalist & Campaigner)

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Eliel Cruz is an articulate, passionate voice in the world of bisexual activism.  He’s a prolific journalist and vlogger, and I was delighted to include Eliel in my recent 5 Great Bisexual Blogs article.

Here’s my interview with Eliel. I hope you find it useful. As Eliel says, ‘Bisexuality is valid, your experience matters, and most of all you matter.’

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-How did you come to identify as bisexual?

Eliel Cruz: I didn’t know what bisexual was until I stumbled upon the word when I googled “I like boys and girls.” I was 11 and super excited to finally understand my sexuality. At the point, I thought you had to “choose” between being gay or straight one day. So I came out to myself at 11, then came out to friends and family around 14.

-What are the main factors that have contributed to your sense of wellbeing as a bisexual person?

I think writing has helped me heal a lot. I used to write diaries when I was young to keep myself sane. Now, as an adult, I write through the things I have gone through and continue to go through on huge platforms. This allows me to connect with thousands of bisexuals who have similar stories to me from across the world. This community and knowing that I’m far from alone helps me tremendously.

-Can you share a coming out story?

My coming out story is complicated. I came out to friends at a private Christian academy during my freshman year of high school. After I came out word got out to my school’s administration. I was “asked to leave.” This made me come out to my family but it was quickly swept under the rug. I came out when I was 18 to my family when I was on my way to college. They have always been loving and accepting which has helped ground me and deal with biphobia.

-What advice would you give to someone who thinks they might be bisexual and are unsure what to do?

There isn’t a rush. Don’t feel like you need to ID a certain way under a certain time frame. Educate yourself in the definition, and history, of bisexuality. Perhaps most importantly, know you’re not alone. There are many others out there with similar experiences. Bisexuality is valid, your experience matters, and most of all you matter. Find community, whether in person or online, and always reach out to bisexual activists or organizations with any questions you may have.

Eliel Cruz is a speaker and writer on religion, (bi)sexuality, and a culture critic. He reports regularly for The Advocate and has a column on the intersections of faith, sexuality, and gender at Religion News Service. His work has also been found in the Huffington Post, Mic, Sojourners, Washington Post, Patheos, Everyday Feminism, DETAILS Magazine, Rolling Stone, VICE, and Slate.

He’s the co-founder and former president of the Intercollegiate Adventist Gay-Straight Alliance Coalition, an organization that advocates for safe spaces for LGBT students at Seventh-day Adventist colleges. He has a BBA & BA in International Business and French Studies from Andrews University.

5 Great Bisexual Blogs

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Sharing in the personal thoughts and reflections of another bisexual person through a blog can be an intimate and powerful experience.  If you’re uncomfortable with your bisexuality, then witnessing others confidently identifying as bi and expressing themselves openly on a blog can be really empowering.

Blogs can also help us to better understand our own bisexuality, providing us with the opportunity to recognise ourselves in the experience of others, and to learn about unfamiliar and different experiences as well.

Here are five of my favourites:

1) Eponymous Fliponymous – Patrick RichardsFink

A self-described ‘angry bisexual with a keyboard’, Patrick RichardsFink is one of the most articulate voices in the bi blogosphere. He covers the full gamut of bisexual issues, including identity, bisexual erasure and gender.  I particularly like Patrick’s writing on the experience of bisexual men. Also check out his writing on biphobia, starting with this passionate post.

2) Bisexuality and Beyond – Sue George

Sue George has been blogging about bisexuality for nearly ten years, making hers one of the longest running bi blogs out there. A journalist by trade, Sue writes beautifully about a wide range of bisexual issues.  I recommend taking some time to browse her substantial archive of posts, as many of her early posts remain relevant today.

Sue’s current focus is the experience of older bisexual people. Her excellent ‘Bi and Over 50’ interview series is well worth checking out.

3) The Bisexual Bangladeshi

Eloquent and thought-provoking, this blogger details his experience as a young bisexual man coming out to family, friends, and work colleagues.   He writes about his efforts to reconcile his sexual orientation with his religion, and also reflects on sexuality and Bangladeshi society.

This is a blog providing valuable insights into bisexuality, religion and culture, but it’s also very good on the universal issues that we face as bisexuals, such as the process of self-acceptance.

4) Hannah Bee’s Bisexual Blog

This new blog established itself earlier this year with a great series of posts providing advice on how to set up a local bisexual group.  Hannah also writes about biphobia and media depictions of bisexuality, as well as reflecting movingly on her experience of bisexuality, family life and bereavement. Her recent post on the lack of LGBT-specific sex education in schools is excellent.

5) Eliel Cruz

Eliel Cruz is a talented and prolific writer specialising in bisexuality, religion, media and culture.   While Eliel doesn’t have a personal blog, he writes regularly online in The Advocate, Huffington Post and Mic.  I especially like his articles which reflect on his own experience, such as this one on biphobia and this one on bisexual identity.

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If you’re struggling with being bisexual, or need support with any aspect of life relating to bisexuality, then I offer personal coaching services via Skype or phone.  Feel free to contact me to set up a free, no obligation 30 minute introductory session.